Sunday, 20 November 2011

The Enemy


Yes, I know it's only been three days since last I posted a lovely chunk of incoherent rambling, but I got all out of sync with my organisation last week and if I don't start obeying the timetable of my own creation, it will surely come to life and kill me. So for the sake of my mortal soul, just deal with it, okay? Anyway, I come bearing solid life advice; you would do well to heed it.

The other week, I wanted to brush my teeth before I went out, but also had to watch the end of an episode of Grey's Anatomy. I thought, what the hell, I'll just start brushing my teeth here in my room; the show will be finished before I am and I can hock my loogie in the sink.

I've always been the kinda gal who likes to wet my toothbrush both before AND after the application of the toothpaste, but that day I had to dry brush. And you know what? It didn't make a difference.

But I realised after a couple of days that it DOES make a difference. Do you know how many antelopes could bathe in those short bursts of water you use every time you wet your brush? Approximately 0.62. Do you know how many antelope die of not bathing each day? Approximately all of them.

So the next time you think about wetting your toothbrush before and after you apply the old fashioned paste we call 'tooth', think about this:

As you can see, this antelope is filthy and also dead. And you're to blame.



  1. I love you Marianne! Keep writing! Would you be willing to help me write a sarcastic and funny "Family Christmas Letter" ?

  2. Am I being dense in not knowing who you are?? The answer is yes either way. And I love you too.