Sunday 24 January 2010

Alles braucht seine Zeit

So it's kind of late; I'm kind of tired; Best Beloved has gone to bed and I'm at a bit of a loose end. I don't really want to get into bed yet because I feel like I should relish the second of the two late nights I get in a week and do something productive. But I don't really have any idea what that something might be besides rambling on about life's little nothingnesses on here for a while.

Well, I've finally begun the long and arduous task of editing my novel. It's not quite finished yet; I still have two half-chapters to write, but because I haven't written anything in so long, I'm kind of out of the swing, so I figured editing would be the best way to get to know it again. It kind of sucks though...I've read these chapters so many times that I actually *hate* some of them now. Not good. I'm also convincing myself that no one is going to like what I've written. Is this storyline too thready? Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. Shit.

Jeez, I want life to just slow the shit DOWN right now. I'm 23 in May and I've only done *one* thing on my List of Things To Do Before I'm 30, and that was eat a Double Decker, and even then Best Beloved had to eat half because I just couldn't face the whole thing all in one go. I should really knuckle down. I should really book a flight to India. Gosh darn.

Anyway, I went to see Fyfe Dangerfield the other night in Manchester. That was pretty near to fantastic. The venue was tiny...basically just a living room with a bar in it. I was so close to him I practically caught his spittle in a jar; it was intense. The support act was darn good also! Villagers...which makes it sound like a band, but actually it was just a guy and his guitar. I think he might have a band, I don't know, so stop fucking asking me, alright? Anyway, I listened to him online afterwards and I would have to say that his acoustic stuff is far far far far far far far far far far far far better in all honesty. He has an amazing voice; he doesn't need all that background filler. I suppose it was kind of annoying how he kept touching his fringe all the time though. Yeah, that was kind of annoying. But then, if you're listening to him without actually watching him, I guess it won't annoy you...the background filler might annoy you, but him touching his fringe shouldn't be a problem, so just don't worry about it for now. Just relax.

Well, tiredness seems to have taken a bigger hold than before and I can't really make any sensible contributions now, so I should probably stop and clamber into my million-miles-away bed...man oh man that's a long way away. Further than that powdery moon. Further than that, for sure. I can't even describe how much I want to be in the very middle of the moon right now, curled like a mouse in its nest, with hot chocolate on an IV drip, being warmed by that pearly glow and just sleeping the next year away while my book writes and publishes itself, while Best Beloved sleeps beside me. Oh *jeeps* that's what I need right now.

"Somewhere out there, there's a young girl who will...never be a nun. Auf Wiedersehen, darling."

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